I have never...

I have never.
I have been more alone than this.
But still...
I wish for sleep that's never ending.
I wish for a coma nap to never wake from.
I wish for the pulsating pain inside my brain to explode...
Destroy me... let my face match my mind... match my soul

And you left... but not forever?
Yes. Whatever you say dear... you were gone before I found you.
No more breathing life back into corpses.
I have never felt alone like this... it's different.
I feel free. No pressure.

I can finally fade.
No more need for me to save you.
And no need to save myself.

Run

don't let your heart hurt now
i am so discouraged - i am sickened by it
i am in a fog or in a clearing - swinging back and forth about you
and what i should do with you
and who i am because of you
and whether or not i really really love you

but you are my best distant friend
and i want nothing but to fill you up with hope
and i want nothing but to show you some true beauty
...but i cannot offer what's not inside me

and your silence kills and your sorrow fills the air with mercy
can't you just get cut a break?
please, give me a break...

Can unhappiness really break us?
Yes. Yes it can...
So let's do something about this.
Let's stop swinging... land in the clearing... hold hands and fucking run(!)



Best friends forever... when you fall, I fall.